So I was at work the other night (shocking, I know), and I received a phone call for one of the many departments I was covering.
It went something like this:
Me: Can I help you?
Dude: Yes. Do you sell wide women's belts?
Me: (thinking does he mean a wide woman...or a wide belt?) I'm pretty sure we have what you need. Any particular style?
Dude: Just wide. In black. Or Brown.
Me: We do have those--and they are buy one get one half off. The belts start around $20.00.
Dude: Hmm. Well, it's for my girlfriend's birthday, which was last week. I forgot. So I guess I can splurge and get both.
This is how the conversation ends--and I hang up thinking Buddy you are SOOO going to get it. $30.00 for belts? WTF you moron! When you FORGET a woman's birthday, it's time to break out the big guns "Baby..I wanted it to be surprise, but it just wasn't ready yet. Did I fool you? Of course I really didn't forget your birthday!" and then bust out the beautiful earrings, necklace, purse--whatever it is for god's sake it's not going to be some utilitarian object that she could buy herself. And a mushy card (Unless it's for me..I hate mushy cards. Blech.)You might as well give her new sheets if you're going to go that route--cause the ones you slept on with her will soon be burned in a bonfire after she kicks your ass out the door.
Now I say this, but actually, what do I know? Yours truly has never received a gift from someone she's dated, but I have lots of friends that have wonderful boyfriends and husbands who spoil them rotten when it comes to gift giving occasions (and in some happy instances, for no reason what so ever). Maybe this girl would be happy with two belts.
But I'm guessing not.
Welcome to singledom Douchey Dude!
No comments:
Post a Comment