Well, it's been a long, long while.
I've been busy with work--and also trying to do things that aren't tied to work or volunteering (and failing miserably it would seem). My defunct laptop screen hasn't helped matters, but I've had lots of awesome people willing to help me rectify that situation. I am now budgeting for my new screen and hope to be up and running at home sooner than later. (Worse case scenario I will be attached to my tv.)
But back to sharing : )
I had an experience this week that was all things, well, disturbing. And it was in the library of all places. I didn't know whether to go home and take a shower or just laugh it off.
I ended up doing both.
To set the scene (and provide you with background)--I go the library at least once a week. I read. A lot. I also enjoy books on CD in the car (yes--I know this makes me Super Nerd-Girl). I just finished listening to Sin in the Second City, which is all about hookers and madams in Chicago. I highly recommend it in audio or book form (I had both). This was the reason for my trip: I was going to return my finished items and pick up my hold (the new biography of the Bronte family-strangely enough not on Amazon in the US, but is up in the UK http://www.amazon.co.uk/Brontes-Juliet-Barker/dp/0349122423). This is not the part you should think is disturbing.
But maybe it should be?
Probably.
But I digress.
I picked up my hold from the shelf and wandered over to the Audio Book section wondering if there was anything to strike my fancy (I'm super picky; no fiction, memoirs need to be read by the author, etc.), when I was knocked into the shelf by a rather large, disheveled guy. Think this:
Driving this:
I'm thinking "You moron, did you not see me?!?" But I said "I'm sorry", because my first instinct is to always just accept it's my fault, I was in the way, blah-blah-blah (something I'm sure a therapist would have a field day with). What did Candy-Van man say?
Nothing.
He licked his lips and grunted at me.
Grunted.
At.
Me.
Then looked me up and down like Jabba the Hutt did every slave girl (green skinned with weird flesh appendages, Princess Leia, blue singing blob thing, et al.) in Return of the Jedi. I could literally feel my skin trying to come off of my bones. This dude? Was seriously creepy. His sweatpants were at least two sizes two small, his t-shirt was about ten sizes too big, and sadly, he was toting around the last Harry Potter book.
Sorry Harry.
I booked it to the other side of the aisle and put creepy dude aside (it takes all kinds, right?). But as I pulled out a book from the shelf--there he was on the other side.
And it gets better.
Cause then he audibly farted.
And it was not a sound, nor a smell, that a person could ignore.
And since my library experience was ruined for the time being, I took my Bronte book and headed to check out and get the hell outta there.
Farty McGee headed to the bean bag chairs in the kiddie section and started reading Harry Potter.
So there you have it! My male conquest of the week is Grunty-Gassy-Van-Man!
It can only go up from here people...and if not?
No. Really. It can't get any worse.
I've been busy with work--and also trying to do things that aren't tied to work or volunteering (and failing miserably it would seem). My defunct laptop screen hasn't helped matters, but I've had lots of awesome people willing to help me rectify that situation. I am now budgeting for my new screen and hope to be up and running at home sooner than later. (Worse case scenario I will be attached to my tv.)
But back to sharing : )
I had an experience this week that was all things, well, disturbing. And it was in the library of all places. I didn't know whether to go home and take a shower or just laugh it off.
I ended up doing both.
To set the scene (and provide you with background)--I go the library at least once a week. I read. A lot. I also enjoy books on CD in the car (yes--I know this makes me Super Nerd-Girl). I just finished listening to Sin in the Second City, which is all about hookers and madams in Chicago. I highly recommend it in audio or book form (I had both). This was the reason for my trip: I was going to return my finished items and pick up my hold (the new biography of the Bronte family-strangely enough not on Amazon in the US, but is up in the UK http://www.amazon.co.uk/Brontes-Juliet-Barker/dp/0349122423). This is not the part you should think is disturbing.
But maybe it should be?
Probably.
But I digress.
I picked up my hold from the shelf and wandered over to the Audio Book section wondering if there was anything to strike my fancy (I'm super picky; no fiction, memoirs need to be read by the author, etc.), when I was knocked into the shelf by a rather large, disheveled guy. Think this:
Driving this:
I'm thinking "You moron, did you not see me?!?" But I said "I'm sorry", because my first instinct is to always just accept it's my fault, I was in the way, blah-blah-blah (something I'm sure a therapist would have a field day with). What did Candy-Van man say?
Nothing.
He licked his lips and grunted at me.
Grunted.
At.
Me.
Then looked me up and down like Jabba the Hutt did every slave girl (green skinned with weird flesh appendages, Princess Leia, blue singing blob thing, et al.) in Return of the Jedi. I could literally feel my skin trying to come off of my bones. This dude? Was seriously creepy. His sweatpants were at least two sizes two small, his t-shirt was about ten sizes too big, and sadly, he was toting around the last Harry Potter book.
Sorry Harry.
I booked it to the other side of the aisle and put creepy dude aside (it takes all kinds, right?). But as I pulled out a book from the shelf--there he was on the other side.
And it gets better.
Cause then he audibly farted.
And it was not a sound, nor a smell, that a person could ignore.
And since my library experience was ruined for the time being, I took my Bronte book and headed to check out and get the hell outta there.
Farty McGee headed to the bean bag chairs in the kiddie section and started reading Harry Potter.
So there you have it! My male conquest of the week is Grunty-Gassy-Van-Man!
It can only go up from here people...and if not?
No. Really. It can't get any worse.
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